Love can not be settling old accounts of the debt

Marriage with Ming Hin, I crush on him for three years. I even many times as his messenger, to my roommate snow passing notes, message after message, send roses ... ... This is undoubtedly worse for me! But time goes by, the pain actually started Zhuixin attributed to moderate gradually . Maybe because I know he will not belong to me, getting used to the audience when a lonely, and derive little satisfaction and happiness: I like when Ming Xuan asked me to help look, and he saw what I normally that part of "not eating" like a polite language than the time of his extraordinarily serious and devout.

Graduated that year, snow was leaving Ming Xuan leave the country. In those days, Ming-Hsuan took me they love the "witness", kept about his love of the snow. One day, I finally himself, he shouted "stop" and tell my feelings over the years. Ming Xuan hear expressions sluggish, but eventually even accepted me. In this way, a pair of sleepy men and women are emotional torment soon into the marriage hall.

married to me or as heartless creature, he even did not even bother to hide his heartless creature. But I told him, but not as a wife should be outrage. And his love of this show, I walked the audience from the lonely hero, though still lonely, but have been met.

Until that year, Ming Xuan's mother hospitalized for pulmonary tuberculosis. Day after work I rushed to wards, elderly sudden coma, is blocked by a blood clot group throat, at stake. I quickly pressed the rescue bell, anxiously awaiting the arrival of medical personnel. Seeing old pale, lips purple, hanging by a thread, medical staff got there. I suddenly remembered a book on the plot, quickly through your mouth to her mouth hard suction. After a few seconds, then finally erupted group clot ... ... stunned people in a house and the buzz, I stood in the doorway to see Ming-Hsuan, looking at me!

Go home at night, Ming-Hsuan deeply watching me. So many years the first time he looked at me with this. I finally could not help Yin Qi. He held my face and said: "These years wronged you, then on, you're my queen!" I cry out. Later found out, light snow had walk out, another reason is unwilling to accept his frail mother.

The day after, Ming-Hsuan do everything I had only dared to hope in his heart but never reveal secret things: cooking and go shopping with me grocery shopping, evening stroll hand in hand, over the weekend out of town, over those who have said to me real sense that he is extremely boring day, he even promised me one child, and so on. One time, I was flattered. Women love to show off is a major nature, I call this "pet" and "surprise" in the years I have been a "diving" loving others the story of peeking inside basking in BBS. The result is contrary to my expectation, not even one cheer! In great embarrassment and loss among, I finally understand: the kind of anxious to show off their own feelings, as if that took things should not be so extreme gratification, in fact, hidden unspeakable pain. Ming Xuan done, the husband of any normal people would do for his wife! Natural thing, there is nothing to show off? My husband has even "natural" things did not gave me! I own "surprise" feel ashamed.

Weekend, early in the morning urging me to get up on Ming Xuan, excitedly said: "Today I arranged a good show!" Greeting the morning breeze to drive all the way and then he galloped to the river, I saw far a kite in the high altitude. Think of studying, I have many times all alone in here to see pairs of young boys and girls, kite flying in the sky, Iraqis in his arms laughing scene ... ... it gave me a coveted, and today, this dream would circle but regrettably, it is late today, my heart is still on for that experience to heart yao BBS constant stream of people made me feel tired of boring. I said: "I do not play, we return to it."

Ming Xuan face of shock, but still quietly asked me if I would like to do next, and constantly put forward various proposals, I have been calmly shook his head. Then his phone rang with important clients to see him. He promised one side while on the phone said to me: "I now send you home, so you think it over us come out to play you?" Seeing the way he rushed, I suddenly changed his mind, said: "I now would like to fly the kite, it is now! "He has a look of embarrassed, I think if he rejected me, that in his mind I compare with a client.

After a little while, he rejected the official, we return to the riverside. I do not have a little enthusiasm, but still, and he spent a half a day, to see if he would send out my half-way good to see his mouth back to Hsuan Cheng Shiming fun you ask me, I was bewildered.

The same blank and my heart. Ming Xuan said I was his Queen, but only those which the Queen's life? I Amoy back home and look at a lot of costume drama to hide, the drama queen are extremely elegant, responsive, living beyond the mortal life. Ming Xuan said I was his queen, he can do 100 hours? I pondered this all day, and continue to seek confirmation from the Ming-Hsuan there. However, despite the Ming Hin each time the percentage by volume, but it has had in the lonely days of calm and satisfaction, but never appeared. Each time, the loss of breeding and discontent are the first to come out, forcing me to go for the next chase and confirmation.

Later, I do not know what they want in the end, anyway, always feel Biequ. One day, I am bored reading a magazine in the office turned to see a story suddenly excited, immediately dial telephone Ming Hin, said: "I now ask you a question, you must tell the truth, and a A come out! "there came the Ming Xuan Ha ha laugh. I asked: "If your mother and I also fell into the water, you can only save one, who would you save?" In the very old fashioned, Ming-Hsuan apparently hesitant end of the line without a voice. This makes me strong dissatisfaction, ranging from his answer, I hung up the phone.

But I can not be reconciled. Ming Xuan-year-old not a father, mother, widow of a man hard to him La Cheda, the mother's weight in his mind can imagine. So, take the eternal challenge to test my heart he is really wonderful. I really hope that this crisis is not the situation there, I just want to get a first Ming Xuan save my answer.

Night in the bedroom, I moved out of the question, he Buyiburao. Ming Xuan has been laughing along with my dumb child. He more so the more I want to ask what happens. Finally, he said: "I save you, I save you, ready now!"

I want to finally get the answer! But meet only a moment. Immediately, I still feel so alone is not enough, now carrying his mother, he said help me, who knows his heart in the end who would like to save? To completely clarify this problem, I said: "Well, we now go in front of you mother's face, you just repeat the words. "I said as he pulled him.

Pulled a long, Ming-Hsuan finally shouted out: "do not trouble enough!" Scare me, stare at him. He said: "According to your style of doing things this time, even if I face when my mother said again, you would definitely still not satisfied. You will definitely pull our Nianglia to find - a river to personally verify! You do not make things difficult me, now I have to find someone to jump to the river! "Then he stormed away.

I stayed there, Biequ may cry. Ming Xuan him so angry, shows that he even really choose to save me, not without hesitation. Children on his way and said I was his Queen ... ... I grew more and more sad, more and more convinced disappointed.

Comments: Guangzhou, Shen Hu Sunflower Counseling Center of consultants

"I" and the conclusion of Ming Xuan marriage with a strong fantasy elements, but in reality the two sides need each other but difficult to play good roles.

"I": in the Ming Court and ex-girlfriend's love, the "I" sees himself as a selfless "perfect caregiver," a silent watchers; when they parted, "I," played a good listener and caring person, give him encouragement; Ming-Hsuan mother was seriously ill, "I" to give ordinary people can not provide help. All this to tell the "I" and Ming-Hsuan own message: I love your selfless, perfect.

"World without love without reason, there is no hate for no reason." Selfless and perfect the back, "I" want someone to love unconditionally and perfect return, "I" envy of all competitors in love, because "I" in love, hard to suppress competition ("I" complain about passing notes in time to help Ming Xuan began only in the way of denying the use of their own). When the "I" suddenly got Ming Xuan's "love" and Naqu time to show off, like a very hungry people get a piece of bread, while for others, of course, the bread will not have any surprise and admiration, " I "can imagine the psychological gap, and even denial of bread for a great value of human life, I began to imagine the side of love - desire to become Queen. When this aspect of breeding, the "I" became unruly and unreasonable children, throw away bread, asked more and more the feeling of fear and become harsh, with aggressive in front of Ming Xuan.

"I" has not been clear about their desire to receive love and love is like. "I" side is selfless, like the perfect mother, but the other side is the lack of love, eager to perfect care of "little girl", immersed in the fear and resentment at the neglect of the past now, the love and acceptance is the way Love is very childish, just like black and white game, in psychology we call "split."

Ming Hin: the Ming Xuan's girlfriend left him, he accepted the "I" feeling, in fact, to deny their true feelings. Before he had used "I" for his unrequited pay, so early in the marriage he greatly

Lie Lie, neglect "I" need. He saw the "I" on his critically ill mother's behavior, he was shocked, guilt and gratitude he lost the psychological to judge, he saw his wife as a goddess, the wife of a real flesh and blood no longer exists. He tried every means to satisfy their inner goddess, but he ignored their abilities. He can not do for himself perfectly and guilt, guilt for his "I" better, "I" more demanding, he ... ... This cycle of guilt, he was unable to extricate themselves. Obtained for a steady stream of people, when he has no ability to meet, he is very depressed, become sensitive to, when once again the "I" with a problem to motivate him, his inner guilt, weakness, pain and depressed at last expression of anger out. This is his spirit back to the real performance.

Fantasy of love is that no one can give the "I" and accept that they are not the Queen and can not be the result of the Queen, is the "I" only way out. As for Ming-Hsuan, love is not appreciated, do not play the role of gratitude with each other a little more relaxed.